Bite-Sized Film Reviews
I’ve been in a movie review dry spell for quite some time. Since I’m still in its grasp, I’m going to stick to impressions this time around:
Thief (1981). I’m one of those rare people who disliked Heat. The women are annoying one-notes, and it belabors its point too much. I enjoyed how streamlined this story is in contrast. Much like a Coen brother character, the hero has his code, and he’s going to follow it, whatever comes. Single-mindedness can be stunning to watch in a film this focused and brief. Even in his directorial debut, Michael Mann had such a distinctive vision and style. Plus, there’s a bizarre romance and Willie Nelson in a cameo. Recommend.
To Live & Die in LA (1985). I’ve loved William Petersen since Manhunter (a much more haunting film than Heat). What’s striking about this movie is not only the main character’s awful morals but his jaw-droppingly bad judgment throughout. (How hard up was the Secret Service in mid-80s fiction to hire this guy?) The car chase is gasp-worthy. So is Petersen at this age. A fun, often tense viewing. Fast paced and fun and so 80s (check out the preview if you doubt me). Why it took so long for Petersen to be appreciated I’ll never know.
The African Queen (1951). Rewatch. I’d forgotten how terrible the heroine’s brother (played by Robert Morley) was at being a missionary. There’s so much comedy in his sad efforts. Her persistence in helping him despite the terrible odds of his succeeding in a single conversion sets the stage beautifully for her later stubbornness and heroism.
The Roses (2025). Why was this made? The War of the Roses (1989) is hilarious. That “woof” in Kathleen Turner’s delivery alone. This remake is not funny. Or interesting. It has nothing new to say. It’s too safe. The humor’s not bleak enough. It doesn’t take the couple’s extremes nearly as far as it should (especially for anyone who has seen the original). What a waste of funny performers. Danny DeVito, your dark humor and courage were sorely missed here.
The Devil Wears Prada 2 (2026). I saw it. I enjoyed it. Kind of. Within 24 hours I’d forgotten the plot and 95% of the scenes.
Somewhere in Time (1980). Rewatch. Richaaaard!!! I will love this film forever.
