Let’s review: Best film Oscar for the director of Kingpin and Dumb and Dumber? 1 Best film Oscar for the director of Do the Right Thing: 0 1990: Do the Right Thing: No Oscar; Driving Miss Daisy: Oscar. 2019: We have two strong films up for best picture by black directors about what it means to be black, Black Panther and BlacKkKlansman–one director a promising newcomer who even made a deep-into-the-Rocky-franchise film memorable, the other one of the most original and gifted directors of our time. And who beats them? A white Farrelly brother, who once directed Kingpin (a film so stupefyingly gross even a dumb-humor fan like me was appalled). And what was this winning film about? Being black in America, a film starring, of course, a white man.
For years I’ve been grumbling, waiting for streaming access to classics I hear about from other blogs: Letter from an Unknown Woman,The Great Lie,A Foreign Affair. Without a Netflix DVD cache or TCM, the classic movie fan is left with few options, and my brief affair with the Warner Archive had given me little love. Then it occurred to me, like a (clichéd) beacon of light in the night: YOU HAVE ACCESS TO INTERLIBRARY LOAN.
How do I love thee, ILL? Let me count the ways.
You don’t tarry. Within a week, all three films were at my library’s front desk. The student helping me didn’t notice my bated breath or strong desire to do the worm in celebration. Used to her fellow students’ desperate and grumpy research requests, she was unaware of the yummy chocolate cake she was handing over to me. Her loss.
You have so much to offer. Greedy after receiving all three films, I thought I’d dare for my elusive, longed-for white whale of a book. I’d just emailed Grace Collins of True Stories of Tinseltown about our upcoming podcast chat on Mae West and Cary Grant when my long-stamped-out desire resurfaced: Goodness Had Nothing to Do with It. I needed it–obviously–for research. Amazon was charging boatloads of cash for Mae’s autobiography, but was it possible I could get my hands on it for free? YES!!!
You give me so MANY moments to savor. Here is one of hundreds of funny interchanges from Mae’s bio: She’s just put on opening night for her first play in New London, CT in 1926. The house manager is grumbling about the ticket purchases: “The title’s scaring them away. Nobody in this town will buy tickets for a show with the title SEX….We don’t talk about sex hereabouts, and we don’t put it on signs.” Only 85 people show for the first performance, and Mae is feeling blue that the first play she wrote and starred in looks like a bomb. But at the next day’s matinee, she sees lines of men from the naval base “two and three deep,” and the manager is scrambling for extra seats for his theater. “And you said it was a bad title,” observes Mae. And he replies, “I forgot about the sailors.”
You let me savor each moment. On Monday morning, I’d been reading my usual dose of terrifying headlines on CNN. I was feeling blue, and knew I had to banish that mood if I had any chance of cheering my 9 am students, who had been staring at me for days with a peculiar type of hostility they’d developed from years of New England winters—the “how-dare-you-deny-me-another-snow-day, woman” look I knew so well. Naturally, I looked to Mae for mood elevation, and found her defense against the newspaper baron, William Randolph Hearst, who–in the midst of delivering his own era’s brand of terrifying headlines–had written this, “Is it not time Congress did something about Mae West?” Thanks to my generous love, ILL, I got to read Mae’s response: “All I have ever wanted to do is entertain people, make them laugh so hard they forget they’d like to cry.” Such an important reminder to me about the need for humor, dear Mae; you bolstered me the rest of the week. And by Friday? I was enjoying Jean Arthur’s and Marlene Dietrich’s charismatic performances in The Foreign Affair. Oh ILL, how I love thee…..
So it’s time again, time to clench my teeth, hoping you don’t screw up, Academy. Don’t blow it, like you did with Thelma Ritter. Don’t blow it, like you did with Barbara Stanwyck. Don’t blow it, like you did with Cary FRICKIN Grant, the only classic movie star so many non-black-and-white film buffs even know. Don’t make her the Academy’s biggest loser, and add to that inexcusable 7 noms and 0 current wins record. GIVE GLENN CLOSE HER OSCAR ALREADY!
Would it be a consolation prize? No. She’s stunning in The Wife, mesmerizing in a deeply human performance of repression and silence and pent-up rage. This role depends on subtlety. Not many actresses of any age, of any time period, could make such a seemingly resigned, still woman look riveting. But Glenn Close? Let’s think about that for a moment…..
Did she fascinate you with her evil machinations in Dangerous Liaisons? Scare the hell out of you in Fatal Attraction? Did you love her in the criminally underrated The Paper? Were you touched by her sweetness in The Natural and The Big Chill? Did you fear for her in The Jagged Edge? Did you enjoy her bitter, yet resigned take-down of her former lover in Le Divorce? (And yes, even in a bit part, you can’t take your eyes off of her.)
I like Olivia Colman, but her weird, histrionic role in The Favourite is not the kind of part that deserves your Oscar. I adore Lady Gaga. But this was a good freshman performance, not an award-winning one. Melissa McCarthy should be your number two, with her deeply funny, deeply sad performance of a woman at the end of her resources. (I admit I have yet to see Yalitza Aparicio’s performance, but I know she’s not one of your frontrunners). But the only living actress besides Close who can show the full range of human experience with a few expressions, gestures, and lines–Meryl Streep–has been showered with THREE of your Oscars. Close? Not a one.
Here’s the thing: The Wife wasn’t watched by nearly as many people as some of the other films whose actresses are up there on the list. And yet, still nominated. WHY?
Because she’s GLENN CLOSE, Academy! The badass actress who OWNS every role she takes, who can make you watch (and yes, just try to resist it) seasons of a show you barely like just to catch her expressions, who can convince you into viewing a movie about dalmatians—dalmatians!–just to catch her take on Cruella de Ville.
Academy, don’t shame yourself, as you did with Close’s partner in non-winning Oscar noms, the wonderful Thelma Ritter (she, like Deborah Kerr, of the 6-0 record). You’ve got a chance not to wait till that lifetime oops-we-screwed-up prize. It’s an easy choice, Academy.
